you've been struck by a smooth criminal
This is more of a moviespeak than a songspeak, but whatevs. I’m posting it anyway. It was one of our poker nights last week at the VFW, and it was getting fairly late in the game. I had already been eliminated, but I was watching my wife play. One hand, the guy sitting to my wife’s right folded his hand preflop, but I can only assume he would have had a good hand, because after the flop was dealt, he said, “Give me back my cards!”, and I said, “Ok, Mel Gibson…” My wife rolled her eyes, but one of the guys next to me chuckled, because he clearly saw how clever I was in referencing Mel Gibson’s famous line from the motion picture Ransom. I’m hilarious.
The year was 1996, and it was our then-annual Lake George camping trip. I believe this trip took place not long after a group of us had gone to see Kingpin (the Farrelly Brothers movie starring Woody Harrelson, Randy Quaid, and Bill Murray). Disco Inferno by the Trammps was featured in the film, and must have remained in our friend Kevin’s head for quite some time afterward, because we would be singing it quite often. Then this songspeak moment occurred: A group of us were playing games at the campsite picnic table (probably Scattergories or some other such party game) while a citronella candle burned at the end of the table to keep the bugs away. Then, the unthinkable happened. One of us tossed a towel aside, and it landed in a most inopportune place. Smack dab on top of the candle. The towel, of course, caught fire, and we immediately threw it onto the ground and stomped it out. Kevin, meanwhile, started singing “Burn, baby, burn…” What we all expected him to sing next was, “It’s a towel inferno!”, but no. Instead, he sang, “It’s a disco towel!”. This made no sense, and due to the tensions being high and our near brush with death*, we all laughed more than we should have. It’s been over 13 years since that fateful day, but Matt and I still remember that songspeak quite fondly.
*And by “death”, I mean “charred towel”.
Tags: 70s music, 90s movies, bill murray, camping, campsite, citronella candle, disco, disco inferno, disco towel, farrelly brothers, kevin, kingpin, lake george, randy quaid, scattergories, the trammps, towel, towel inferno, woody harrelson
Given all the death and despair lately, I think it’s time to get back to songspeak basics. Which is why I’ve decided to tell y’all about an old songstory courtesy of our friend Kevin. You may remember his misheard No Doubt lyrics. Anyway, Kevin is a big classic rock fan, and him and I spent many a night listening to the Dazed and Confused soundtracks in his jeep as we drove around. Kevin also liked the Steve Miller Band, and had many alternate lyrics to various Steve Miller songs. One particular one that I remember was his alternate lyrics for Swingtown. The song starts, “Come on and dance, come on and dance, let’s make some romance…”, but whenever Kevin would hear it, without fail he would sing, “Take off your pants, take off your pants, let’s make some romance…”. Personally, I think Kevin’s lyrics are much more fitting than the original ones. And so should you.
Tags: 70s music, 90s movies, classic rock, come on and dance, dazed and confused, death and despair, kevin, let's make some romance, no doubt, steve miller, steve miller band, swingtown, take off your pants
I can’t help but notice the songspeak site has had some banner ads for the McCain/Palin campaign lately. I can only imagine this is because we’ve had a few McCain and Palin related posts recently, but rest assured that we here at Songspeak in no way, shape, or form support the McCain/Palin ticket.
So it bothers me that ads for them are popping up on the site. Why should it look like we’re promoting someone that we don’t support, nor agree with? Worse yet, the ad looks like some sort of satire, repeating the “maverick” catchphrase over and over. This whole maverick idea is one of the most ridiculous things I’ve seen in politics, and reeks of pandering to the lowest common denominator. “Hey, Joe Six-Pack! We’re mavericks! We’re gonna shoot up Washington with change…YEE-HAAAWWWWWW!” The whole thing seems like one big (sad) joke. But it’s for real. Frightening. (Never mind that I don’t understand how a candidate like McCain that has served in the senate for 22 years can pretend that he’d be “change”).
Everyone knows that the ORIGINAL mavericks are the Ford Maverick, James Garner (who played Maverick in the TV series that ran from 1957 to 1962), Tom Cruise (who played Maverick in the 1986 hit movie Top Gun), and Mel Gibson (who played Maverick in the 1994 movie version of the TV series). And even though one is a car, and two of them are total whackjobs now, I’m confident that ANY of them would make a better Vice President (or President) than Sarah Palin. Especially the car.
Tags: 50s tv, 60s tv, 80s movies, 90s movies, ford maverick, james garner, joe six-pack, john mccain, lowest common denominator, maverick, mccain/palin, mel gibson, president, sarah palin, tom cruise, top gun, vice president, washington DC, whackjobs
Watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall this past weekend and How I Met Your Mother on Monday got me to thinking about Jason Segal’s start on Freaks and Geeks, and some of the more classic moments from that show. Awhile back, Matt posted about Nick serenading Lindsey with the Styx classic Lady.
Well, one of my favorite Nick moments from Freaks and Geeks is when he’s drumming along with Spirit of the Radio by Rush. One would think he’s doing an awesome job, until his dad comes down the stairs and you get the perspective of the outside observer.
This scene is so great because not only is it an awesome song, but who hasn’t been singing along to the car radio, or doing karaoke, and thinking they sound awesome, when, in reality, they’re awful?
Tangential anecdote: Jo and I once shared a flight to Australia with Jason Segal (thankfully, it didn’t crash on a mysterious island). We noticed him waiting in the Auckland, New Zealand airport on our layover along with the rest of the passengers from our plane. Which is funny because the night before we had watched Can’t Hardly Wait in the hotel room, and he has a small cameo in that. And now, thanks to Forgetting Sarah Marshall, I’ve seen his penis.
Tags: 00s movies, 80s music, 90s movies, 90s tv, anthony cooper, auckland, australia, can't hardly wait, flight, forgetting sarah marshall, freaks and geeks, how i met your mother, jason segal, jason segal's penis, john locke, john locke's dad, karaoke, kevin tighe, lady, lady of the morning, lindsey, lost, lostaholics, new zealand, nick, rush, singing along to the car radio, spirit of the radio, styx, terry o'quinn
Bill’s comment in my Ghostbusters post reminded me of a moviespeak that’s been a favorite for some time now. It originates from the Nutty Professor remake starring Eddie Murphy. In the scene, Professor Klump is out on a date at a comedy club. The comedian (played by Dave Chapelle in an early role) comes out and just starts telling generic stand-up-comedian type jokes about women shopping and such. During the act, the soft-spoken Klump leans over to his date (a pre-married Jada Pinkett-Smith) and says, “That is true, women do shop” (because most stand-up comedians are funny due to the “it’s funny because it’s true” law of comedy). When I first saw this movie when I was going to WPI, this line just struck us as funny. So we would always say it in every situation. And if anyone EVER said “that’s true”, we’d finish with “women DO shop”. I’ve been doing it for years now, and it’s caught on with most everyone I know.
Unfortunately, the scene takes a decidedly nasty turn for the worse when the comedian starts making fun of people in the crowd, and spies the rather large Professor Klump.
Tags: 90s movies, academy award, comedy club, dave chapelle, eddie murphy, ghostbusters, it's funny because it's true, jada pinkett-smith, nutty professor, oscar, professor klump, that is true, women be shoppin', women do shop, wpi
Who doesn’t like Morgan Freeman? No one, that’s who. I can’t think of another actor so universally beloved. Seriously. So imagine our concern here at Songspeak when we heard that he was in a horrific car accident yesterday.
It looks like he’s gonna be ok, which is a miracle considering his car was seen to go airborne off the highway and flip a few times before landing in a ditch. Since he’s God (as seen in Bruce Almighty and Evan Almighty), I guess it’s a shock that he suffered any injury at all. Maybe this will be the kick in the ass he needs to finish his Bucket List. I just hope he’s not found at fault in the accident, or else he may end up in Shawshank prison. I can only imagine the Deep Impact his car had on the side of the highway. Maybe it was a Dark Knight and he just couldn’t see the road. Actually, rumor has it he may have fallen asleep at the wheel. I’m sure Miss Daisy wouldn’t approve.
Whatever happened, I’m glad he’s ok.
What I didn’t remember, however, is that he was on The Electric Company. Anybody remember watching that when they were a kid? I did, but I don’t remember the Easy Reader. I think the following video showcases Morgan Freeman’s range better than any movie could:
Hang in there, Easy Reader. We’re pullin’ for ya.
Tags: 00s movies, 70s tv, 80s movies, 90s movies, accident, airborne, asleep at the wheel, barenaked ladies, bruce almighty, bucket list, dark knight, deep impact, driving miss daisy, evan almighty, God, morgan freeman, morgan freeman car accident, shawshank redemption, tonight is the night i fell asleep at the wheel
We lost our first Golden Girl yesterday when Estelle Getty passed away at age 84. I used to watch Golden Girls with my grandparents when I was a kid, and it amazes me how much of the humor must have gone over my head at the time. I’m not the only person my age who used to watch it, and it’s odd to think of a show about a bunch of old ladies appealing to 10 year olds.
Poor old Estelle suffered from Lewy’s Body Dementia, and it was this sickness that led to her untimely demise.
What does this have to do with songspeak, you ask? Well, I know myself and others have songspoken the Golden Girls theme song on many occasions. That, as well as Sophia’s spunk and sass, prompted me to post.
Lately I’ve been seeing tv commercials for an AutoTrader.com featuring Godzilla by Blue Oyster Cult. You know, the ones where “the giant guy is looking at the cars?” as Jamie said to me over an IM to me this morning. I was having a hard time remembering which of the plethora of auto sites (Carfax, Vehix, Cars.com, etc.) it actually was.
Jamie, (his fiance at the time, but now) wife Jo, myself, and my dad went to see this one very special evening.
Godzilla 2000, or Gojira ni-sen mireniamu as it’s known in Japan, is Takao Okawara’s version of the 1954 classic Godzilla. And even though there were films after the 1954 version, this storyline ignores that. It’s all about a UFO invading Tokyo and Godzilla fighting with it.
It’s interesting that this movie was made and released in 1999 in Japan. Remember all the Y2K crap that people were freaking out about?
Anyway, this is not to be confused with the really terrible Hollywood-i-fied version of Godzilla in 1998ish that Taco Bell sponsored. Taco Bell and the damn chihuahua dog in all their tv commercials. Oh, you don’t remember “I think I need a bigger box”? Jamie and I have been known to quote this from time to time even still.
Here’s video of that commercial:
Tags: 00s movies, 50s movies, 90s movies, autotrader, carfax, cars.com, chihuahua, cinemark, dog, godzilla, godzilla 2000, gojira ni-sen mireniamu, i think i need a bigger box, taco bell, takao okawara, vehix