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TAG: trapped in the closet

• songspeak

  Interview with R. Kelly a real pisser

  posted by matt | 09.17.08 | permalink | 1 comment

  

  "It's time for me to move on. I can't keep answering these questions. If you was charged with something and you were found innocent, then you can't be found guilty for being found innocent."

  Closet hider and porn aficionado R. Kelly was interviewed last night on BET by Toure. The interview, “R. Kelly Speaks” was the first interview since Kelly was found not guilty of child pornography charges from a 2001 tape allegedly showing Kelly having sex with an underage girl. The case began after a videotape was delivered anonymously to the Chicago Sun-Times. See their timeline and complete coverage of the trial.

  Whenever we think of R. Kelly here at Songspeak, we basically think of three defining things: I Believe I Can Fly, Trapped In The Closet, and this great skit from Chappelle’s Show. It’s a little number called Piss On You (lyrics here):

  Here’s a partial transcript of the BET interview:

  Toure: Let me ask you something real that millions of Americans are thinking about and wondering about you. Do you like teenage girls?
  Kelly: When you say teenage, how old are we talking?
  Toure: Girls who are teenagers.
  Kelly: 19?
  Toure: 19 and younger.
  Kelly: I have some 19-year-old friends, but I don’t like anybody illegal if that’s what we’re talking about, underage.
  Toure: Uh-huh. Some people think that you like underage girls. What do you say to that?
  Kelly: Those people don’t know Robert. They don’t know me. I usually don’t get into what people think about me, because all my career — even before the trial — people had their opinions about Robert, you know. That’s probably because, it had a lot to do with me kind of shying away from the crowd, ’cause I’m always in the the studio, digging deep into the basement all the time of my house, creating music. So when people don’t know you, they can’t touch you like they could someone else. They seem to form opinions or have thoughts about you that they like to, you know, think.
  Toure: Some of the people who’ve worked with you have said there’s an issue here. Your former manager has said publicly there’s an issue of concern here. Your brother Carey has said there’s an issue of concern here.
  Kelly: Issue of concern? What do you mean when you say issue of concern?
  Toure: They said that they’re concerned that you like underage girls.

  (more…)

  Tags: BET interview, chappelle's show, chicago sun-times, child pornography, dave chappelle, girl, innocent, jury, not guilty, piss on you, pisser, porn, r. kelly, robert kelly, sex, teenage, toure, trapped in the closet, trial, underage, urine, videotape

• songspeak

  Trapped in the closet

  posted by matt | 04.25.08 | permalink | 1 comment

  Jamie and I have been making Songspeak Greatest Hits mixes for years now, and while we’ve tried to make them reasonably listenable, we can never deny a truly awful song’s inclusion if it falls under the category of (what we consider to be) songspeak.

  That said, even some of these types of songs are just so damn long for a mix… A lot of Pink Floyd songs, Alice’s Restaurant by Arlo Guthrie, pretty much anything by Tool, and of course, Trapped In The Closet by R. Kelly.

  Trapped In The Closet, R. Kelly’s ridiculous hip-hopera with all the soap opera elements (sex, betrayal, gunplay) was released in installments of one chapter at a time. Its first twelve chapters run over 30 minutes long. I know this because I own the dvd. When he wrote it, in 2005, he always left the storyline open ended. In 2007, he wrote another ten chapters, and apparently we can expect more chapters. By the way, the dvd is great because there’s commentary on it. First of all, the song itself is basically an R. Kelly singing narration of the storyline. The commentary, therefore, is R. Kelly commenting on the narration of the storyline… just in case the story wasn’t clear or whatever.

  It’s been parodied a bunch of times, but I think my favorite is South Park’s Trapped In The Closet, the infamous Scientology episode where Tom Cruise thinks Stan is L. Ron Hubbard and gets upset because he doesn’t like his acting. Eventually Tom Cruise and John Travolta are both stuck in the closet and R. Kelly tries to coax them out.

  (more…)

  Tags: 00s music, 00s tv, best week ever, hip-hopera, r. kelly, south park, trapped in the closet